Memorial Day 5-21-09 Send a copy to Dr Dan Potenza NH VAH

Memorial Day 5-21-09 Send a copy to Dr Dan Potenza NH VAH
Peter Macdonald 465 Packersfalls rd Lee NH 03024 603-659-6217
Is life real? I read in the paper today about a new Play called Letters. The description highlights how people will get the feeling of the U.S. Military writing these letters. The lonely ness, separation, complacency with life and death as a daily ingrown part of our permanent mental image of where we are. Erasing the memories that haunt you in untimely, daily flashes at the most inconvenient moment. The conflict of what we did! To the unacceptable description from the people that have never been there qualifying our actions as despicable and uncivilized. Our youthful development of the desire to give to a nation that we call home through deplorable, inconceivable conditions and events that society can not believe ever could or did happen. The need and want to come back to a world “nation” that can not and will not accept us for what we did. A nation that we gave everything for that we no longer belong. We lose our families, friends, jobs, place in society to become that loser that at one time had great potential. The homeless bum on the street (U.S. Military Veteran) accepts that keeping what we did, must be silenced to protect this innocent society from learning what they will never be able to accept. Can all this be real.
The funny thing is that I learned to write as a way to learn how to accept that I had no memory from a car accident right out of Parris Island. I left on a thirty one month tour over seas with no memory at all of life back here. I learned to write to keep in touch with people that I had no memory of ever seeing before never mind family that I lived with or girls that I dated. The NH government put me in jail to stop my writing opinion letters under the Patriot Act. I have three more combat related disabilities from separate missions only to have the freedom that we gave for be publicly taken way. Society questions my mental state but accepts the criminal acts committed by our judicial and government personal to stop my letters. I question reality in most of my letters because to identify what is real has plagued me since waking up in a military uniform at 17 to kill the enemy only because? I accepted the deplorable condition and daily experiences with only to hope to one day see the nation other Marines talked about while waiting to die. Writing has become my way of silently telling society what is real only to find that reality does not exist in my world. Funny thing is that my letters are censored to keep society from learning the criminal acts of the people we trust.
I want to talk about all the other Veterans that this civilized society can not accept. The veteran returning today or the many of past, lost in a world that those that never served call home. A place that our reality, you can not perceive because it makes no since to others. The VA stopped my medical care and I write about it. It is the thousands of others that do not write that my case should highlight. These are the neglected, forgotten Veteran society believe that a play or a parade will bring us back. You say welcome with open arms only to watch our politicians turn their faces away if we ask.
Reality is that we should never have come back. The smart ones will always see the reality of war in their final memory. Those lucky enough to come back will use suicide to be accepted in a place that can not accept us. I have tried suicide only to be sent back to a society to learn to accept reality before my mission is complete.
We give to protect and defend our Constriction. Can you see my reality?
Peter Macdonald Sgt USMC Semper Fi