Veterans and Depression 4-26-08

Veterans and Depression 4-26-08
Peter Macdonald 465 Packersfalls rd Lee NH 03824 603-659-6217
I have since being discharged from the Marine Corps in 1974 lived with what I did! Traumatic Brain injury left me with no memory as I started my over seas tour. To this day I do not remember any part of my life growing up as a child. At 17, I was a U.S. Marine fighting for a country that I had no memory of. I can remember landing at SF airport ( either when I was transporting a prisoner or discharged) and being greeted by hippies spitting on me with the words “Baby Killer”. The U.S. was like a foreign land to me. My entire memory of life was that of a U.S. Marine. Meeting, talking and going out with “round eyed girls” placed me in a utopia after discharge. I soon had difficulties socializing and conforming to a civilized society. No one told me what to do and I no longer had a platoon to command. I was lost in a world that I did not belong. One day I bumped into a child hood friend that recognized my difficulties adjusting. I did not remember him but he got me to sign up in college and gave me a room in his apartment. I started volunteering helping others that same year. Every day even 30 years later I volunteer to help others. It was my way of accepting that I for some strange reason was allowed to come back alive. It was my dream to some day live in the land (U.S.) that I only knew from what other Marines talked about. I met my family and home town friends but soon learned they told stories of things of my past I could only accept as true.
I married a great woman and have three great girls. Do you know what it is like some times not remembering your own child’s name. How about questioning everyday things that you do (if they are the socially right thing). How about even having your wife understand even though I do not show my pain that I do have disabilities. I live life as though nothing is wrong with me. I have for thirty years tried to fit into society. I have trouble hearing but I pretend to hear what people are saying so that others will not alienate me. I will work and carry items even with my broken back so people will not think that I am lazy. I give because so many that never came back deserve the respect.
Rob from the vine blog tells me he likes reading my letters but that what NH and the VA is doing to me is my imagination. What NH and the VA is doing is crimes against the Constitution. I volunteer my time to help this Madbury family that out of the blue called me for help. They were so desperate that they called in response to my letter to the editor. I brought Judge Fauver’s constitutional crimes to the NH supreme court case 2003-0477. The NHSC refused to hear the case. To stop me NH put me in jail as a terrorist, stopped my VA medical, use the police to harass my family constantly, use my service connected disabilities to inflict pain and suffering on me and much more.
The facts are all documented. People believe it sounds unreal so it is unreal. I am not depressed because of what NH and the VA is doing. I am not depressed for what I did as a U.S. Marine. Society tells me that people should talk about what is in their minds. People tell me that veterans never talk about what they lived through. The VA and Boston globe tell me to commit suicide. Society tells me that is wrong. People tell me government officials do not violate the law. NH and the VA have violated the law to protect a criminal judge (Peter Fauver). Society may believe that I am a mental case making this up but it is documented. What does a disabled U.S. Marine do when the Courts, Government and VA discriminate against you and the news approves of these crimes by censoring the public from truth. Peter Macdonald Sgt USMC Semper Fi